Many of us are embarrassed by our early influences. No one admits to how much they loved listening to Matchbox Twenty, watching Spielberg films, or reading The Hunger Games. Everyone’s too worried about promoting how refined their tastes are.
But underneath all that virtue signaling, the truth is that your early influences were foundational to many of the things you find inspiration in today. They’re the branches who first led you to the mediums and ideas that resonate strongest with you.
One of the most important influences of my early twenties was author Tim Ferriss (and he continues to be to this day). But because of how many people he’s reached–also known as success–he has his haters. While an aversion to the mainstream might be inherent to high-brow culture, it’s ridiculous to think you’re above your early influences. Without Ferriss, I wouldn’t have discovered eighty percent of the most influential books I’ve read in recent years.
The Branches: Tim Ferriss led me to Derek Sivers, who led me to Nassim Taleb and Stoicism, which led me to Ryan Holiday, who led me to Robert Greene. These are the authors, entrepreneurs, and philosophers who have had the most profound influence in my life over the past ten years.
Foundational influences matter because they connect us with more specific interests and allow us to explore those in greater depth. For me, Ferriss is brilliant in orchestrating these connections.
The same concept holds true for influences in any other area of interest or field of study. Those who first peaked your curiosity–regardless of reason–helped lay the groundwork for where you are today. If you trace the past decade of your deepest interests, you’ll start to see a map similar to the one above.
If you’re too worried about virtue signaling and showing off your refined tastes, you’re not only missing the point, you’re actively discouraging others.
It’s important to allow your tastes to evolve, but don’t dismiss someone who’s just starting out. Allow them the an opportunity to explore on their own without telling them what they should care about.
Investor and entrepreneur, Naval Ravikant, offers advice for early readers that’s applicable across disciplines, “Read what you love, until you love to read.” People who love to read and dig into books on complex ideas started by reading simpler subjects that resonated with them years earlier.
You begin based on where you are today and what your natural interests are. Otherwise you don’t learn to love reading (or music, film, sports, finance, international business, teaching, technology). And if you don’t develop a love for reading itself, you’re never going to make it from R.L Stine’s Goosebumps to Nassim Taleb’s Incerto.
If you’re too busy feigning interest in what you’re supposed to care about, instead of what you actually enjoy, you’ll kill your natural curiosity trying to keep up with the connoisseurs.
Your early influences, based on your unique interests, are the ones who help build your latticework of mental models and network of influences. From here you can begin branching out to connect different ideas, authors, concepts, and styles.
Embrace your early influences. The only thing that matters is what resonates with you at this point in your life and what you find inspiration in. It’s okay to listen to a catchy pop song or read a pop-fiction title just because you enjoy it. That’s reason enough. Let the foundation lead the way.
How the Stoics Mastered the Art of Influence
Desire for influence is human nature. Many people allow this to dictate the course of their lives, often unaware. But the Stoic philosophers developed a deeper sense of awareness and took the opposite approach.
Influence wasn’t their end goal. They approached it with indifference and chalked it up to fortune–nice to have but nonessential. Instead, they offered a more effective strategy–seek meaning over influence.
If you focus on work that matters to you and discover significance in yourself, you put yourself in a position to build something that strikes a deeper chord with others.
“Find significance within yourself. Within your own sphere of power–that is where you have the greatest consequence.”
But if influence acts as your guiding principle, you dull your sense of authenticity and depth. You might get lucky and hit the target a few times. But you’ll always be guessing. And it’s difficult to sustain when you’re creating from outside of yourself and dependent on things beyond your control.
It’s a dangerous game to tie your sense of meaning and self-worth to external conditions. You introduce dependencies that can drop you into a state of anxiety, envy or despair, without warning.
Sooner or later your voice begins to waiver. By allowing influence to dictate your decisions, you compromise the quality of your work and your character. And how much good can you do if you sacrifice your integrity and a sense of meaning in your work along the way?
What you’re building must first resonate with you before you can expect it to resonate with anyone else.
“But if you lose your honor in striving for greater (perceived) significance, you become useless.”
People gravitate towards those who have discovered a deeper sense of meaning in their work. That’s why the Stoics remain relevant to this day. They created from a place of meaning and valued their internal compass over recognition.
When you seek meaning over influence, you add an unusual depth to your voice that draws people in.
Epictetus, Marcus, and Seneca knew this well. They channeled their own sense of authenticity into their work and they way they lived their lives.
As their influence grew, they leveraged it to contribute something worthwhile. But they weren’t dependent on it. Despite the obstacles faced and privileges afforded, they remained focused on what was within their realm of control–living a meaningful life to the best of their ability.
Meaning starts with something that’s all your own. By prioritizing meaning over influence, you build the courage to speak from a place that resonates with you.
You would be foolish to ignore your audience entirely. But that’s a secondary consideration because there’s no guarantee. You’re the one who has to live with the work you put out into the world and the way you live your life.
Influence is far more likely to follow if you build something you believe in.
Keep your principles in order. When influence tilts your way, you’ll be prepared to lead with a steady hand like a Stoic. You’ll position yourself as the antithesis of the paranoid, corrupt leaders scattered throughout history.
But if you fail to assign things their proper value, you’ll risk losing yourself to an obsession with influence and power.
Focus instead on the things that are your own and create from there. There’s more fulfillment in this work and it often leads to better outcomes.
When you focus on your own authenticity, there’s a far greater chance it will resonate and make a measurable difference in someone else’s life. And even if it doesn’t, it remains valuable because it meant something to you. There’s a fundamental beauty in that.
“Beautiful things of any kind are beautiful in themselves and sufficient to themselves. Praise is extraneous...Are any of those improved by being praised? Or damaged by contempt?”
It’s a rare thing in this world to first seek significance in yourself and build the courage to create something that resonates with you. Trust yourself. The world is drawn to authenticity.
When you value meaning over influence you’ll achieve a state of relaxed concentration to do the work that matters. The work you find meaning in. And it’s through this work that you build character and a sense of authenticity.
Seek meaning first, authenticity and influence will follow.
Seek influence first and you’ll risk losing yourself along the way.
*My original post appeared on Daily Stoic – a great resource for all things Stoicism. Check out their daily email for thought-provoking morning meditations.